Of colon cancer, black people, and rape songs

The radio sure has got me thinking.

First, I keep hearing about “Colorectal Awareness Month”, which is March. For those who don’t know (like myself before Googling), colorectal cancer is colon cancer: that nefarious cancer that seems to affect many, many older people

But a whole month? Seriously? For one cancer? Believe me, I am no friend of illnesses, but to dedicate a whole month out of the year for cancerous asses seems a little asinine considering we dedicate one month out of the year for Black history.

But then I thought: hey, maybe more people in this country are affected by colon cancer than I think. Maybe my allergic reaction to this is not at the scent of bullshit, but because of some ignorance on my part. Naturally, I set out to find out whether or not this was the case.

According to cancer.org, whom I assume is knowledgeable about these things, 1 in 20 people will develop colon cancer. Or, in other words, 5% of the population will develop colon cancer to some degree in their lifetime. That may not seem like a huge statistic, but 5% is actually a lot. That is about 15 million people in this country: no number to balk at.

But let us not forget that Black history month precedes colorectal cancer awareness month. Statistically, according to the 2011 census, there are almost 40 million black people living in the United States. And, I would like to add, that this number does not include people of mixed descent. Not only that, but there are hundreds of years of history behind black people in this country. The struggle of the African has been a central point in the history of the New World, and the effects of that struggle are being played out today both in America and in other parts of the New World (the Caribbean, South America, Central America) as well as Africa.

And yet, we take one month (a single month) out of the year to reflect (dare I say celebrate) the history of black people in this country. A single month. And I never see any ribbons for black history like I do for cancers and diseases that affect even smaller minorities of the population.

I am not condoning cancer or disease, and nor am I condemning Black History Month. But I do believe black history should not be made front and center for a single month. I think we should focus more on cultural literacy in this country; not on fundraising sensationalism. One of these things can move us forward in peace and cooperation and general goodwill. The other one can be a misappropriated fund collected at the cash registers across America.

Something else on the radio got me thinking: there is a song where the lyrics go: “Your saying ‘no’ but your body is telling me ‘yes'”. I am absolutely stunned by this song. This is the classic rape scenario. Imagine using this line of reasoning in a court case defending yourself should you go to trial for rape: “But your Honor, her body kept saying ‘yes’.” The judge would look at you, pronounce you apeshit dumb, and then send you to prison where your body will say yes to your bunk and showermates no matter how long you squeal “no.”

Seriously, what is wrong with society these days?

The All-Meat Experiment Conclusion-Findings

Sunday was the final day of my all animal product week, which consisted of every type of meat I could get my hands on. For a basic list, I ate dairy in every form (cottage cheese, cheese, yogurt, milk, homemade ice cream, sour cream, heavy whipping cream) and every inexpensive meat you could think of (eggs, pork, beef, mackerel, tuna, anchovies, sardines, venison, tilapia).

First, since I want to make sure that fat is not a concern, I want to say there was zero weight change from when I started to when I ended. None. Nothing changed as far as numbers on the scale went.

However, that leads directly into my second point and was interesting for me to learn: I am a water-retaining mofo. My body, in the presence of fiber from fruits and vegetables, stores water as if it was going to trek the deserts. Indeed, if I were an animal, I would be one of those camels with two humps. How do I know? First a bit of science.

When people generate fat (de novo lipogenesis) they create fat cells. Those fat cells accumulate in different parts of the body depending on gender and body type (I am more of an endomorph, so I get extra fat around the middle. Like a woman. But without the need to be “curvaceous”. Damnit). Those fat cells, minus artificial removal, are there for the whole ride. It is impossible to remove these fat cells by diet or exercise. The most you can do is empty those fat cells out, or flatten them.

For those of you who know my life story, I was a fat kid. Not cute chub, or baby fat, but fat. Fat like you would say, “Hey look, that kid is fat” fat. It was sad. And I continued this lifestyle till I was about 22. Then I lost a lot of weight (and lean body mass, and muscle, and anything good worth mentioning). But I evacuated a lot of fat cells. While this left me skinny, it also left me with scores of empty fat cells.

The body is not wasteful. In fact, the body is very adaptable. So, the body looks at those fat cells and says, “Hey, you know what I can store in those cells? Water! That way I will never die of thirst!” Thus, when exposed to excess amounts of water and the biological processes of carbohydrate digestion kick in, water is shuttled from the blood into these fat cells. In my case, I have always had a water retention problem, and this experiment has shown me just how much.

You see, once I cut out the fruits and veggies (and 90% of my carbohydrate intake), my remaining fat (I am bulking for weightlifting) went from dense to loose. Or in other words, the water content went way, way down and I was left with mostly deflated fat cells. This made me all jiggly, and highlighted my perennial problem: damn hanger-onner fat cells 😦

So my fat went from dense with water to barely hydrated. This reduced my circumference and allowed me to see my four pack again, but it also left the skin and water-bloated cells left as jiggly and very loose. Thus, by cutting out fruits and veggies, I was able to drain my body of excess water. Hurrah!

Now, onto gym performance. This would probably be one of the more key indicators of how my body can react. In regards to this, the bag is mixed.

Monday and Wednesday showed a marked deflation in used muscles. That deflation is due to the glycogen, which is expelled under use, to be depleted within the fibrous pouches formed by muscular fibers. This is because glycogen is formed in the processes of insulin production and glucose formation–both processed linked with carbohydrates in most people. Cut the carbs, cut these processes. Thus flatness.

However, the body, being adaptable as I mentioned, has a process to fix this. If the body thinks that this situation of carbohydrate lacking is looking to be a long-term issues, it can take protein and enact the process of glucogenesis, or glucose generation. The amino acids in protein can break down into these simple sugars and act in two roles. I don’t like to think of what protein deficiency means to someone lifting weights to bulk, but I kept my protein high (hovering around 200g/day) in anticipation of this phenomenon.

Did it occur? Yes! By Friday, my muscles were inflated and ready to rock. But, unusually, I was not feeling quite into it and did a lighter day (less weights, more reps). Does that equate to roughly the same work as a typical day? Yes, but it was also indicative of a trend.

Without the extra carbohydrates to generate the insulin (key in both muscular and fat generation), my recoveries were not typical. More typically, I have a protein shake with a banana, spinach, carrots, and milk. Instead, I only had milk (plus my dinner of just meat and dairy). The animal products only left me feeling depleted and generally inflamed longer after the gym every time.

The really interesting thing was that despite the failed recoveries, or what I perceived as failed recoveries, my performance actually didn’t suffer. My lifts progressed at their usual clip. This makes me think that glycogen expenditure and restoration is not the be all, end all of performance in training. Of course, this would concur with new research that lactic acid, once thought to be a mere by-product of glycogen depletion, is actually a bodily process meant to act as a temporary stop gap measure in muscular endurance.

I also experienced more DOMS while eating naught but animal products. DOMS, or delayed onset muscular soreness, is when muscles are taxed but not immediately sore, but rather sore the day after next. For example, I would occasionally get sore muscles the day after hitting the gym like a beast, but by the day after that, I was recouped completely. Not so during the week. Instead, I actually felt still a bit inflamed the day after followed by some soreness on the day after that. Luckily the soreness faded by about the afternoon, but it still occurred.

Besides that, I did get cravings for fruits and veggies about three days in. I mean, serious, “I might break this experiment” cravings. They passed, though, with the consumption of pork rinds, or, as the Mexicans call them, chicharrones. Si, bueno, si. I think it is no coincidence that my body began glucogenesis as the cravings hit. I imagine the two processes are linked somehow, but I am not smart enough to discern the causative binding, if there is one.

Some other odds and ends:

The first night, after big lifting, I had uncontrollable testosterone flow. How do I know? Well, to be quite honest, it was due to an unaccounted for and unwished midnight boner. And I mean concrete stuff. This may gross people out, but it is the honest truth and is scientifically backed.

Here’s how: when testosterone begins to flow more freely in teenagers (especially boys), it usually is the first signs of puberty, which also spurs human growth hormone. These same processes are measured and occur with heavy weight lifting sessions. In both cases, the group experiencing it often experience wet dreams and midnight/morning wood. This is because of the bodily response to elevated levels of testosterone. This also causes acne and awkwardness in social situations (or it did for me, anyway). 

And yet, I have been lifting heavy for a long time without experiencing this phenomenon (which recurred through the week especially on lifting days), so I believe that carbohydrates and insulin tend to limit or negate higher testosterone levels with myself. I will have to experiment with this to see if this is true, but the idea is there.

I had no gas. My bowel movements were regular and without problem, but I just didn’t have any particularly smelly farts. And, to confirm, my first dip back into carbs today confirmed that fruits and vegetables are the source of my nose-turning flatulence (when I get it).

I never felt bloated except when I ate soup. Sure, I felt full plenty of times, but I never felt weighed down with food. Even when I overate (or think I overate), I still felt lithe and nimble. And in general, I felt much lighter and agile during this time.

My moods were generally consistently high and I had a very clear mind throughout the whole thing. No real “carb flu” fog to speak of, and my moods were basically the same.

Meals were super quick and easy most of the time. No having to worry about steaming/chopping/preparing veggies. And consequently, there were less dishes and more time to do whatever. I even set my alarm to wake up for a half hour later with no ill effect. There is a plus. Also, food was generally cheaper, since fruits and vegetables as dollars/calorie are more expensive than fats and meats (if you buy cheap, like I do).

Now the question: would I recommend this? It depends, to be honest. For most Americans, doing this would be tantamount to throwing away three quarters of their diet. Could that be a good thing? Sure as shit it could be, but I find that people generally get upset when you talk about abortion, diet, Dr. Oz, etc. and you don’t agree with them.

If you are serious about your health, and are not living from one box of Hamburger Helper to the next with rolls of Wonder bread mixed in, sure, give it a shot. You might like it. I actually really enjoyed the experience as an intervention. I could probably continue it for a while, though I am not going to.

However, the experiment has taught me many things about my body, and it has made something clear: I would probably function best on a carb cycle-style diet where I eat some fruits and veggies every day, but only go hard on them every once in a while. This will keep me from retaining water, but leave me with enough fuel to go big on lifts and gain mass without slopping up on body fat.

If you have any questions for me about this experiment, please, ask. I will more than happily answer any questions the best of my knowledge/abilities.

 

The All-Meat Self-Experiment Write Up

It is March, and I am afflicted with March Madness. Well, maybe not madness, but I am feeling like a self-experiment that is going to be fun. But challenging.

This month’s self-experiment is going to be an all-meat week. That’s right: every meal every day will be composed of naught but water, herbs, spices, and animal products. Be it organ or muscle, I am making animal tissue disappear.

Before I talk about my reasons for this, I do want to explain what I mean by all-meat: all things consumed this week will originate directly from an animal. In other words, dairy products, like cheese, butter, and milk are allowed. Yogurt is allowed, but nothing with fruit or extra flavors (like honey–though honey is funnily enough an animal product, I just don’t foresee it making the cut).

With the food clarified, I want to talk about the reasons I am doing this.

1. The Inuit’s of old subsisted solely on animal flesh and very rare, if ever, fruits, nuts, roots, and veggies. Their diet consisted mostly of blubber and organ meat, with muscle thrown in. Yes, that is right: the organ meats were recognized by them as the healthiest part of the animal (rightfully so), and thus the most revered were given things like the heads and brains to eat. But the fact of the matter is they had little to no access to fruits or veggies and they were often in better than optimal condition.

2. Not that it means a lot to me, but I will almost certainly enter a ketogenic state, and perhaps I will have the chance to really analyze how that makes me feel.

For all those uninitiated, ketosis is when the body actually burns fat for energy as the primary source of fuel. This is a prized state for many, and for those looking to shed some pounds, a desirable goal.

My main interest in this state is measuring how I respond to strength training in this state. I recently (last few months) have started lifting heavy weights, which draws a lot on glucogen deposits if done for extended duration. Being that muscular glucogen is generated most typically by carbohydrates (or rather their bodily utilization process), it will be interesting to gauge how fast my body adapts.

And what I mean by adaptation is that it has been shown that the body can convert protein to glucose (the carbohydrate building block). It cannot, however, convert glucose to protein. This, I believe, is what causes many the brain fog or addling following a low-carb diet; the brain needs glucose, and if it does not have a source, its performance suffers. How fast your body can adapt to using protein versus carbs will determine how long one is caught in this “carb flu” where the body’s performance temporarily suffers (for some it is instant, for others it can take months). In the past, my body has been able to seemingly flip the switch on the drop of a needle, but it will be something for me to keep my eye on as I push the body to work.

3. Eating in this style is cheaper. Unfortunately, that is the sad case. I consume ~$20 worth of fruits and vegetables a week. I estimate (at 8 eggs and a pound of meat a day, plus milk and butter), spending about $5/day on food. Considering I would eat about the same, minus the fruits and veggies, I can save about $25 a week (yogurt for vegetable dip, coconut oil to cook vegetables in, etc.)

4. Cooking will be far quicker. Without having to worry about cutting up and preparing fruits or vegetables, I can easily trim 10-20 minutes meal off of prep time. Considering I eat three meals a day regularly, that may be as much as an hour’s worth of time saved.

I expect that many may be thinking that this will be an easy challenge, but before I address this, I want to go over a few ideas that are NOT the reasons I am doing this.

1. I am not pretending to be an Inuit or some sort of hunter. I know full well that both of these lifestyles incorporate far more elements than I can account for or even understand. To this effect, I am still going to take my regular supplements, cook with spices, drink tea and coffee, and enjoy the luxuries of modern living.

2. I am not attempting to lose weight. In fact, I cooked up some hardboiled eggs tonight because I am not sure if I will get enough calories after I my fruits and vegetables (last time I did a calorie check, carbohydrates made up ~25% of my caloric intake. Now it will be closer to 5%). Thus I might have to push for more than a pound of meat a day, and I know I am going to up my breakfast to 8 eggs instead of 6. I am especially sensitive to this issue because in order to properly strength train, you have to eat enough.

3. I am not doing this because I think it is “manly”. I think such a concept linked to how you eat is stupid. In fact, to act as a sort of counterpoint to this self-experiment, I am going to go hardcore vegan in April for a week. I love fruits and vegetables and all of the wonderful things that grow from the ground meant for human consumption.

In fact, I think that will be the hardest part: resisting the wonderful taste of a crisp carrot, a crunchy apple, or a handful of almonds. I love these things. But, in the name of discovery, I must go on.

To summarize:

1. All consumed food products will have an animal origin save for a few exceptions, such as coffee and tea, herbs, and water. I will allow a few sauces, but with good reason. (Mustard is seed based and non-caloric; Worcestershire sauce is anchovy-based, and so is Thai fish paste).

2. I will still take my modern vitamin supplements, especially since the cheap, feedlot meat I eat will be nutritionally much more void than the meat carnivorous people tended to rely on. Again, I am not trying to emulate their lifestyle: I am a modern person.

3. Dairy is allowed as long as it is fairly close to the origin product (no chocolate milk, fruit yogurt, or vegetable-infused cream cheeses, for instance). All dairy will be full fat.

4. This will run from Monday to Monday.

That is it. If you have questions or comments, please ask. I will check in after my gym days (Mon, Wed, Fri) to let you all know how it went.

Scientists Are Stupid

And that is why they are awesome.

What? Doesn’t make sense? Don’t be too quick to come to that conclusion, for the truth is that discovery is not based on knowing, but not knowing.

Take someone who does not understand something simple, like stacking boxes. One might ask, observing a well-constructed wall of cardboard cubes, “how do I get the boxes from the floor into a stack?” If someone were obstinate or prone to anger, they may respond, “well, stupid, you lift one and put it on top of the other until it turns into that wall.” The questioner then proceeds to stack boxes, eventually constructing his own great wall.

But let us expand the example to something a bit more complex; let us look at combustible engines. If someone were to ask, “how does this engine create energy?” a mechanic may answer, detailing the process. Now, in this case, the topic is more complex than Tetris mastery, but the idea is the same–there is some idea of a final outcome, but no understanding of the process.

The difference is the “stupid” scientist (or person unknowing of exact processes to reach final product) can take a given explanation and attempt to retool it. Instead of one type of combustible liquid, they may ask about using another. This may lead to “it has been done, here are the results,” or possibly, “I don’t know, let’s try it/research it.”

What I am trying to point out is that what “intelligent” people do, what inventors and pioneers do, is not adhere to solutions given. What they do is proceed “stupidly” into a solution. Discovery is not knowing the answer–in fact, discovery is only possible when one doesn’t know the answer (that is why it is revelation and not review).

Why am I hitting on this topic? I think it is important for everyone (myself included) to incorporate this philosophy into their life. Rather than accept dogma (or generate it yourself), you should be constantly looking at alternatives. Life, the most exciting life, is about the new and the changing, even if it does shock and challenge.

This is why Socrates was so successful and revered: he shocked people by challenging their beliefs and presenting alternative viewpoints. His strength was asking questions, not reciting axioms. In this sense, he generated the self-destroying axiom that drives science to push the limits of what it can do. That is the answer to the question Meno asks: we cannot know the answer to a question posed lest the power of the question fail to drive intelligent, creative thinking.

So go out there and be stupid. Sure, there are some things probably set in stone (we cannot fly without aid, objects have mass, and excessive amounts of alcohol will still get you drunk), but we must learn to take risks, accept challenge, and be willing to change our minds. I believe that this is the true mark of intelligence: to seek and find, not stop and stagnate.